We maneuvered through the store to the bathroom and commenced changing him. B-man was my helper and gave me piles of paper towels to help. (There were no paper towels left by the time we were done.) I did have wipes, but sometimes you need some paper towels to help contain some of the mess and to use less wipes. I got off his dirty clothes, cleaned him up and was reaching for something in my bag when I hear the sound of running water. I turn around to see J sending a solid stream over his head and off the changing table onto the floor of the bathroom! Thankfully there were no people around. I quickly dried off his face (you know how boys always manage to get themselves in the face a little too) and then got the diaper on so that no further damage could occur. Then I used all those paper towels to dry up the mess and clean things up. To make matters worse, I realized that I had no change of clothes for J. So here we are walking through the store with my baby in just a diaper. I know, classy right?
Then as we are trying to walk quickly to the front to pay for our purchase I notice two people talking, and one of them has an eye patch. I was really trying to distract B-man and get past them without him noticing, but to no avail. Picture the scene, me pulling the cart with a naked baby, and now B-man saying repeatedly "Look Mom, a Pirate!" While I try to say "yes, I see." Without letting the poor man hear. B-man doesn't stop saying something though until he knows he has been heard. I hope that man knows how sorry I am.
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5 comments:
Way to go, B-man for recognizing a pirate so quickly!! Great write-up.
Sorry about the horrid walmart trip.
The best part about that story is you knew it was coming. With the pirate and everything. I love you.
I was really wondering why you chose a pirate as the 'ghetto' symbol, but then I got to the end and it all came together.
It's ok because at the Borders where I am now employed, a grown adult man pooped on the bathroom floor. For no good reason. Now that is ghetto.
Then I had to help a midget man and his oversized girlfriend check out and it took everything I had not to pipe up about how confident they both must be to have a romantic relationship with a person who does not match them in size. Good thing he wasn't a midget with an eye patch. I wouldn't have been able to hold back.
that walmart does bring out the best in people, doesn't it?
Sho, you accidentally wrote "Borders" when you meant to write "the circus".
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